Saturday, August 05, 2006

BURNING RUBBER

In 1992, in Houston Texas, the day after Pat Buchanan foalminated in his famous Cross of Mold speech at the Republican National Convention about how ours was a Christian (mean: fat lazy rage-filled middle-aged white men in the red states fucking their zombie wives up the ass in Barca Lounges) country, George H.W. Bush gave his keynote address - which, if possible, was an even more genuine embarrassment that Pitchforkedtonuge Pat's was.

Among little Georgie's bons mots: 'Why, if that governor of Arkansas get elected President, nothing will ever get done in the Congress. Clinton-Gore, Gridlocked Congress (actually, it would stand to reason, according to the Republican viewpoint, that plenty would get done, but never mind. The intellectual difference between George W and George H.W. basically comes down to this: George W. wouldn't even be permitted to carry the fruitcake salad to a Mensa meeting, while George H.W. might at least be able to bring the cowpies). Just picture that. (And now, in a complete contradiction of what he said). And picture something even worse: (starts banging fist rapidly, bringing voice to stacatto crescendo): a rubber check Congress (a Congress that would spend out of control), and a RUBBER STAMP PRE SI DENT!")

(Crowd goes wild - that is to say, one member even does a jig - breaks into dance, that is).

So, from 1992-1994, some would say we had a "Rubber Check Congress and a Rubber Stamp President"
From 1994-2000, we had a "Rubber-Hating Congress" and a "Rubber-Less" President
What have we had from 2001-the present?

A Rubber check, rubber-hating, rubberized (i.e. Ted Stevens) Congress, and a President in rubber pants.

Beginning in January of 2007, could it just be that we have a GENUINE rubber check Congress (i.e. one that writes a check that ACTUALLY bounces, as if that could happen in Washington), one that no longer answers to a now lame rubber-duck President?

That, as Shakespeare said, is the rub.

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